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maw
Jaw? or paw?
And yes... Kinjutsu is correct
Jaw is more accurate, and I added Kinjutsu under type.
Seems good to me, but with the lack of sleep, I'll look over it when you actually submit it
That is so long away.... thanks anyway!
Lionsbrew
25-03-2009, 06:18
I would define the physical enhancements clearly to avoid confusion.
Maybe put in how it increases. Is it a single tier or rank+1 of your current stat?
Like does it go from good to very good? I dunno Only thing I could see that might give any trouble other than that I say."Good Job!"*gives thumbs up and nice guy pose*
As the one it is based on suggests one level (at least) I put this at two, considering how much more powerful a B rank is compared to a C I think that is fair (correct me if I am wrong).
So because both need to be used at once it is three levels all together
My next creation is up now, help me un-hax it!
Looking at the first jutsu, I noticed an issue- You say it increases by two levels, but in the example (good-very good), only a single level increase is shown. An example of increasing by two levels would be Good to Great.
On with the second jutsu (which is why I'm here in the first place, being a clan jutsu and all), it looks mostly fine to me. I assume all the smoke goes to the arms? How fast are the arms? How sharp/long are the claws?
Hironidin
25-03-2009, 20:58
Originally on the second one, i believed it was simply manipulating the smoke to get it from Point A to Point B in a very intimidating manner.
But now im seeing a problem with it being solid-ish and also able to wound somebody, maybe you should mention that the claws and/or hands are strengthened somehow to make them stronger (solid-er?) than the rest of the arm.
Anyway just my 2 cents
The example is just to show my definition of levels, not the amount increased. I didn’t want someone deciding I was going from genin to EJ strength or anything....
I’ll define a speed when I get home later but the claws are about as sharp as the tip of a kunai and length depends on how far away they are, at the max range probably around an inch and when real close.... I don’t know.... around the size of a regular Kunai? I’ll change it later today.
I have mentioned that they are solid-ish, and the arms are more proper smoke. I don’t know how better to explain that.
I have moved the fist jutsu to my block of info thread and updated the second.
Could someone have another look?
I’ll pull this up again and see if there are any more points to work on.
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